Issue 1 Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum A Different View Of Keynsham www.caneshum.co.uk October 2003
A KEYNSHAM SITE FOR CANE SHUM PEOPLE, LIKE...

A sign of things to come... "WELL WE'VE quite literally been up all night compiling this first edition of Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum, toiling over a hot keyboard to bring you the very latest Keynsham news, views and shock exclusives. Our more astute readers will probably be wondering where they've seen this sort of website before.

Well fret no more all you great thinkers and drinkers - we're happy to admit that our inspiration comes directly from that great bastion of Bristol-based satire That Be Bristle. So inspired in fact, that we virtually ripped-off their layout in a brazen act of plagiarism, the likes of which haven't been seen since a young Roger Pepsi stole a sneaky glance over the wall of the Coca Cola factory and hatched a bright idea. Shocking behaviour. To be honest, it's just that we laughed our b*****ks off so much that we felt it our duty to bring this kind of 'experience' to the people of good old Keynsham. Or 'Cane Shum' as we tend to call it...

And finally, before you start taking offence at the content of this site, remember this: We're NOT anti-Keynsham. We've lived here for years and we've had many chances to escape if we'd wanted to. We're just trying to raise a smile at the expense of the town's quirks and oddities - it's a great place with great people. 'Nuff said! Click here if you ever need reminding of this fact."


CANE SHUM NEWS HEADLINES...
'We are safe. Protected...'
ALSO IN THIS MONTH'S BUMPER FIRST EDITION...
Muhammed Saeed al-Sahaf assesses the state of Keynsham's HIGH STREET shops, Anna Cacia-Court delivers her scathing MONTHLY MOAN,
a hearty selection of READERS' LETTERS, some NEWS about crime rates falling and your chance to own a Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum T-SHIRT.


THE MONTHLY MOAN
Who, what or where is in the firing line this month? Is it Henry, the mild-mannered janitor? Could be... MORE

AL-SAHAF IN KEYNSHAM
Continuing (well, actually, commencing) our regular cartoon featuring outpourings from none other than the former Iraqi Information Minister Muhammed Saeed al-Sahaf as he travels the lands of Keynsham. MORE

KEYNSHAM WEB CAM
See our up-to-the-second webcam which is currently situated on the Town Hall in the centre of town. VIEW IT

WEATHER FORECAST
Check out the lastest Wet Office advance weather forecast for the Keynsham region.
VIEW WEATHER

MERCHANDISE
Never mind the colour, feel the quality...
Launching our exclusive range of Could 'Dis Be Cane Shum T-shirts. Don't be seen not dead in one. BUY STUFF

KEYNSHAM IS ACE!
We love Keynsham! If you need reminding, CLICK HERE


The World according to Albert Mills - Proudly clogging up the arteries of the Internet with satirical nonsense since 2003